What to Do When You Inevitably Hear “I’m Bored” this Summer
It didn’t work then and it doesn’t work now, but let’s be honest with ourselves, why would it? But as I reflect on things, I no longer think it’s actually supposed to work. It’s not really supposed to make a child think, “Hm. That Lady Who Gave Birth To Me is right. Maybe I should pause for a moment and look inward; what choices am I making right now that are keeping me trapped in this cycle of discontent?”
No. The more parenting I do, the more I realize that as a parent it is your duty to be as boring as possible from time to time, so that they will flee to another room and give you the precious time you need to read that fresh new copy of your favorite lifestyle magazine that just came in the mail. Your. Duty. This morning I outdid myself. When they came into the kitchen wearing the heavy yoke of boredom, their shoulders slumped, their tiny fingers trailing across the table, aimlessly knocking the newspaper to the ground, I kindly offered a solution to their current state of being: “I’m so glad you’re here. Can you put on NPR for me? I’d really like to get Leonard Lopate’s take on this whole NYC charter school bugaboo.” And when they softly backed out of the room, as quiet as church mice, I put my feet up and drank my coffee in blissful silence, just as the Lord intended. I’m not sure what they did, but I’m sure it was wonderful and they learned a lot. I forgive myself for not being the most fun parent ever on an around-the-clock basis; the way I see it, I’m really doing them a favor. Just think of how creative they’ll be once I get through this stack of old New Yorkers!
